We need to rest.

We need to put the laundry down, leave it unfolded. We need to do more of a sub-par job at making dinner.

It’s okay to let the toys stay out. Let’s not impulse buy the next thing. Talk to the other parents and have a birthday party without presents and favors. Party favors are just a lot of plastic that becomes trash.

Be a little more messy. A little more loose.

Why?

It’s not only because we need sleep.

It’s because the people and systems of power want you tired. When you’re too tired to fight back, that keeps you where you are.

Rest, not just because every human being deserves rest, but because rest is a form of action. Filling your own cup will help you have the energy to fight. And we’re going to need you to fight.

So let those pajamas be worn five times. I sniff them and as long as they don’t stink, back they go into the laundry pile. When you wash them, toss them into the wash inside out. Leave them inside out. Don't fold them. Put them on inside out. There’s no one judging you for how your kids wear pajamas. Keep a sloppy basket for clean laundry in their room and toss things in it.

File it under "good enough" because really, it is good enough. Perfectly folded toddler pajamas are not what’s going to get paid leave on the agenda in congress, and it’s not going to pay for maternal healthcare.

Your house is supposed to be a place to live. It’s not supposed to be a display case. Perfectly folded toddler pajamas aren't going to move the needle. They're just going to make you tired.

— Sarah Peck
CEO & Founder
Startup Parent

PS: I love asking people what they don’t do. What are all the things that you let be messy, chaotic, or never done in your house? Turn those guilts into brags on this thread dedicated to all the things we don’t do.

ANNOUNCEMENTS & INVITATIONS

LEADERSHIP MIXER FOR BUSINESS MOMS — On Tuesday, March 7th, 2023 at 1pm ET, I'm hosting a leadership session mixer with a focus on reconnecting to your values. If you’re a mom in business, join us.
PANDEMIC STORYTELLING CIRCLE — On Friday, March 10th, 2023 at 1pm ET, we’re hosting an event open to the broader Startup Parent community—moms, dads, pet parents, caretakers—anyone who would like to can attend our special pandemic storytelling circle.
DR. POOJA LAKSHMIN — Excited to announce that Dr. Pooja Lakshmin is our next guest on The Startup Parent Podcast this week, with a deep dive into why doing more doesn’t make us feel better—in fact, it might result in rage, depression, exhaustion, dissociation, and more. Her book comes out next week!
THE WISE WOMEN’S COUNCIL — Interested in joining us in The Wise Women’s Council? Applications are open for our Spring Cohort until Tuesday, March 14th, 2023. There are scholarship opportunities as part of our work towards social justice and social equity.

Free Anonymous black girl lying on stack of clothes in bedroom Stock Photo

Let Your House Stay Messy